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Scoop’s Scribbles: Flex

Posted on February 1, 2025February 1, 2025 by Scott Thomas

NEW YORK CITY:

Note to Readers: My name is Mark “Scoop” Saltmarsh, your humble correspondent, and I’m happy to announce that the following is my first edition of what will be a regular column covering the New York Kings.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past 24 months, you know that New York Kings’ centerfielder Neil Pound has been the talk of the town.

After stellar seasons at Madison College in Harrisonburg, Virginia, Pound was selected first overall by the Kings in 1914.

The following year, team management declared Pound fit for the big leagues, and the poised lefty proved them right.

Last season, Pound led the LBL in batting average, doubles, and was named league MVP.

Despite the Kings’ current struggles, Pound continues to excel with a .351 batting average.

At only 5 foot 8 inches tall and weighing 150 lbs., Pound is not physically imposing.

So, what’s the secret to Pound being the bee’s knees?

Pound credited life choices and a creative approach.

“I take care of my body. No tobacco or alcohol. Daily calisthenics and swimming. Mechanotherapy.”

Most are familiar with Pound’s teetotaler views and avoidance of juice joints, but a “mechano” what?

Pound chuckled when asked for clarification.

“Dr. Gustav Zander? The Swedish doctor who invented those exercise machines with the pulleys, like they have at the Westside YMCA?”

“Rather than doing pull-ups all the time, those Zander machines have helped me develop brawny muscles in my legs and arms. The extra strength helps me drive balls in the alley.”

Pound emphasized the latter point with a double bicep flex.

Image: Dr. G. Zander’s medico-mechanische 1892 Gymnastik manual

Mechanotherapy huh?

Perhaps Zander’s equipment manufacturer should hire Pound as their spokesperson. Every stickballer this side of the Hudson would then lobby his father for the latest in these exercise machines.

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